In early childhood, children are still developing social skills, so some behaviors may look like bullying even when they are not intended to be hurtful. They may leave friends out, copy unkind actions to fit in, or hitting when they cannot express themselves. Sometimes they tease, laugh at mistakes, or use name-calling without understanding the impact. These behaviors are common as young children learn how to relate to others and manage their emotions.
Why These Occur
They are still learning: They might only want one best friend, or test their limits to feel powerful.
Personal feelings: They may feel sad, insecure or want attention. Stress at home, like divorce, money problems, or a parent being sick, can also cause them to act out. Putting someone else down can be a way to feel better about themselves.
Children copy what they see online
Kids learn by watching. If they see rude behavior, teasing, or aggressive actions in videos, games, or social media, they may think it is normal. They then repeat the same actions with their friends.
Fitting in: Sometimes they join in teasing just to be part of the group.
Lack of guidance on healthy communication
When parents are very busy, children may not get enough time to talk, share feelings, or feel comforted at home. This can make it hard for them to handle their emotions or speak kindly to others, which can lead to bullying behaviour.
The environment: Bullying often happens in places with low adult supervision. These "hot spots" include playgrounds, bathrooms, hallways, and the school bus.
Targeting differences: A child who seems "different" is often a target. This can be because of their appearance, race, religion, clothes, abilities, or even a shy personality.
Personal feelings: They may feel sad, insecure or want attention. Stress at home, like divorce, money problems, or a parent being sick, can also cause them to act out. Putting someone else down can be a way to feel better about themselves.
Children copy what they see online
Kids learn by watching. If they see rude behavior, teasing, or aggressive actions in videos, games, or social media, they may think it is normal. They then repeat the same actions with their friends.
Fitting in: Sometimes they join in teasing just to be part of the group.
Lack of guidance on healthy communication
When parents are very busy, children may not get enough time to talk, share feelings, or feel comforted at home. This can make it hard for them to handle their emotions or speak kindly to others, which can lead to bullying behaviour.
The environment: Bullying often happens in places with low adult supervision. These "hot spots" include playgrounds, bathrooms, hallways, and the school bus.
Targeting differences: A child who seems "different" is often a target. This can be because of their appearance, race, religion, clothes, abilities, or even a shy personality.
Practical Ways to Help Your Child if They Are Being Bullied
1. Talk Regularly: Encourage your child to share their feelings and experiences at school. Ask questions about their day, friends, and emotions. (Refer: Why Family Meals Matters)
2. Sometimes children feel unhappy because they can’t say what they need. Teaching them easy-to-use sentences, such as:
- To join in: "Can I play too?"
- To protest: "I don't like that."
- To suggest a solution: "Can we take turns?"
- Walk away / Find a teacher / Find a safe friend.
- Remember, walking away is a strong skill. It shows you can protect yourself and stay safe.
If Your Child Is the Bully - What Parents Can Do at Home
1. Address the Behavior at Home
- Stay calm and listen to your child's side of the story.
- Talk about the action, not
the child. Say
"That was a hurtful thing to do," not "You are naughty."
- Teach empathy. Ask, "How would you feel if someone
did that to you?"
- Help them make it right, like apologizing or doing something kind
for the child they hurt.
- Praise kind behavior when you see it.
2. Reduce Rough Play
- Rough play at home can lead to hitting at school.
- Limit wrestling and physical play.
- Teach "We use gentle hands with people."
3. Limit Screen Time
- Too much screen time can make children more impatient and aggressive.
- Replace screen time with: Outdoor play / Board games
4. Set Clear Routines (Refer: Simple
Routines Kids Love)
- Children with regular routines behave better.
- Keep set times for sleep, meals, and calm bedtimes.
- A tired child is more likely to get angry and hit.
Key Principle for School Authority
For young children, the response must be immediate,
consistent, and focused on teaching the missing social skill. The
role of the school is to be a guide, not just a judge.
XOXO, EyeQ Mum Club
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